I still live with my parents and they’re in their upper 60’s. I don’t know what I’m going to do when they’re gone. I can’t work nor drive.

@A MyEpilepsyTeam Member I've been going through it w/ my parents since 2022. My mom, then 87 was having urinary issues, so my dad 88 decided to cut back on her drinking which caused stability, mental, & other issues. She fell & we found out what was happening, a caregiver stayed w/ them. The primary caregiver would only help / make food for my mom which made Dad very angry (you know the feeling) so he stopped eating, & taking water pill (The 2ndary caregiver was loved). Long story short. Dad ended up w/ congestive heart failure. Mom's dementia required assisted living, Dad was in Independent living 1 building away & would see her. 2 people together for 65 yrs, they know what each other is thinking, so no real talking, except when someone visited. Dad wouldn't go out w/o Mom, so he wouldn't go out period, unless to the restaurant for food or the store.
Now it's just Dad, he's in independent living, he gets down to dining hall once a day for dinner. I watched baseball with him yesterday, as a face is always welcome. He keeps me up on sports, the Cardinals & Blues. I try to get him out for pizza, just outside the building, or whatever once in awhile. As you know 4 walls seem daunting. Dad knows that if I don't feel right I won't drive, so I call instead, a voice makes all the difference in the world. Picking up a phone like we used too adds a lot, especially if you can't make it in. Texting & Email to me seem impersonal unless necessary. He's more active now, sees more people, etc.
If you go to Church, have your pastor stop by. One of the pastors at my Church came to know them well & continues to see my dad & give communion. It's always nice to get that reminder that God is always watching over us, especially when we get in a rut.
1) Make sure you get a good caregiver if that's where you want to go.
2) Try to find a place that has activities, hopefully a common dining room.
3) The workers there & residents become friends.
4) This may seem weird, but If you find a place, make sure it's well lit as dimly lit facilities or homes seem depressing, for anyone.

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A MyEpile...

thank you!

@A MyEpilepsyTeam Member , As you start to look at finding a doctor to do some testing like @A MyEpilepsyTeam Member said, you might ask the doctor what kind of facility would be good for your parents to live in. I’ve worked in 3 different types, an assisted living & that facility had another area for those with dementia & Alzheimer’s to live in, then I worked in a nursing home & then I worked at a nursing & rehab facility. At the first 2 I was an Activity Assistant & at the last place I was a dietary aide in the kitchen. Now I’m a volunteer at an independent living facility where our friend lives & I call Bingo twice a week. So it would be good to find a place that has activities for your parents to participate in. Keep your budget in mind because the place I worked at was out of pocket pay & so make sure you ask if you want to see if a facility takes insurance. Facilities offer 3 meals a day, activities, transportation to doctor appointments & sometimes they go on fun outings, etc. When looking at certain facilities, I suggest you look it up at www.google.com & look for reviews & feedback about the facilities. Here is a website that is a place where you might find people who could help you find the appropriate facility: It’s called A Place For Mom www.aplaceformom.com. Your friend in Texas, Becky

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I'm a caregiver for my elderly mother. She is 80 and both of us cannot drive. We depend on my sister and niece to help with transportation. We look out for eachother mom and I.