i'm replying to my own question..140 characters not enough...i do no pleasure driving, and won't drive with anyone in my car. i only drive to dr appts, and to town for necessities. also, i only drive on hwys that have a center divider. after five years wondering if i'm being paranoid. i have clonic tonic seizures when i get them, with no auras.

Over time, the driving becomes more normal. I had my brain surgery in 2014 I got my license back in 2017. At first, I was nervous, but I also had a special meeting with a behind-the-wheel instructor. He had had to approve me to drive and he had been rather impressed! I am now 10 years seizure-free and to me it is now part of my normal life. I am getting my Masters degree. I don't give up easily.

You are welcome, hang in there and try and stay pos,

thx for the input. i've had seizures since 2009 from a cavernous angioma that leaked just TWO PINPOINTS or blood. up until 2016 i wasn't overly concerned about them...sure, i have been injured from falls; skull fracture and a couple of concussions etc. however, the one in 2016 shook me to the core. i had a seizure while in a hot tub. if alone, i would have died. that's when the gravity of my situation really hit home. back then i averaged probably a seizure a year. the odds of having one, and being in a hot tub at the same time, to me, are very, very, very small. yet i had one. that woke me up to the fact that these could actually kill me. but more profound, was the realization that if i could have one in a hot tub, i certainly could have one while driving. i wouldn't mind if i only killed myself, but the thought of killing another due to my own selfishness (driving) is something that i feel i just can't do. hence, my reluctance to drive, even as minimally as i do. (i drive well under 10k miles a year). some say i'm stupid...i could have a heart attack etc while driving and kill someone, so why worry about driving? a heart attack or whatever could happen i suppose, but i have a PREDISPOSITION for a potential seizure that will never go away, and will happen again at some point.
long winded, but it's nice to 'talk' about this with someone other than myself. thx for listening. :)

I'm pretty sure that's normal even with people who don't have seizures still have that fear actually at times. I get worried about getting on a vehicle to drive not due to me dying but due to killing a person or a animal.